Half way through our second full day in Stockholm, Rory wrestled my trusty notebook out of my hands and wrote the following:
“Awkward and slightly embarrassing moments
- Mum unable to say ‘hop on, hop off’
- Dad unable to use credit card properly
- Indecisive when buying hot-dogs
- Getting in the boat
- Getting out of the boat
- Looking at maps too often
- Leaving the Photographic museum by accident, having just entered”
- I cannot say, ‘hop on, hop off’. It comes out as ‘hop on, hoff off’. The boys thought I was completely mad but please do try saying this out loud and tell me I’m not the only one.
- Dougie shouldn’t be let loose near a parking meter, credit card machine or vending machine. He puts cards in upside down, presses the wrong button, loses coins. His brain freezes and the machine follows suit.
- It was raining, Rory was hungry, we were near an amusement park and the only instant fuel was a hot dog stand. Too many varieties, no idea what they were called. I annoyed my son even more my making inane chit-chat with the woman serving. I did this a lot on holiday, accompanied by over-enthusiastic laughter regarding translation and inability to speak the lingo. In restaurants I am worse because I sing or hum along to background music. I have turned into my mother. Rory prefers us all to be anonymous and not bring attention to ourselves.
- We tried to hop on the boat at one stop but, because it was raining, the door was shut. We couldn’t work out how to open it so waved at the people inside.
- We nearly forgot to hop off at one point and were forced to do an embarrassing scramble up the aisle.
- I love maps and guide books but can’t seem to retain the information contained within. Five seconds after I have used the map to locate a street, I need to look at it again because I have forgotten where I should be going.
- Having paid our entrance fee to the Fotografiska, we had to use the ticket to go though the turnstile. This, for Dougie, was tricky in itself. We then decided we were hungry, the restaurant was on the top floor and I spotted an elevator back in the gift shop. It was only having gone through another turnstile to reach the shop, we realised we had exited the museum and couldn’t get back in. This required queuing for a replacement ticket. We will, no doubt, go down in history as the fastest ever visit to this museum: about 30 seconds.
|The most embarrassing parents in the world?|