I had to smile over my morning cuppa today when I turned to the back page of the News Review of the Sunday Times. Iceland’s Phallological Museum, which we visited in 2007, has, at long last, secured a human exhibit for its impressive collection.
Local man, Pall Arason, aged 95, had donated his precious member to friend and curator of the museum Sigurdur Hjartarson. Pall died in January so his penis will now take pride of place in the museum. Up until this year the only human specimens were the foreskin from a 40 year old Icelander and the testicles from a 55 year old Icelander: that must have taken some balls.
The visit to the museum in Husavik was one of the highlights of our trip to Iceland. You can read about it here. Rory was still young enough not to be too embarrassed, Dougie felt emasculated by the impressive size of the bolt-upright whale selection and I pointed and giggled a lot.
We read at the time that a few generous chaps had already bequeathed their members but had not yet died so there was a bit of a race on to see whose willy would win the day. 95 year old Pall was the natural front-runner, although I was secretly hoping “Elmo” the treasured todger of American Stan Underwood, would beat him by a head. Stan had already provided the museum with a cast of his penis and had suggested his wife would look after it for a while after he died, before it was donated to the museum. Stan was in his fifties, however, so Elmo was always likely to be attached for a little longer than his Icelandic competitor.
I feel a little sorry for Stan that he didn’t win the coveted first prize but there’s no shame in coming second: in fact it’s something most penises would be proud of………isn’t that right, Elmo?
Please to be upstanding for the tower of strength we have lovingly known as Pall (The Rock) Arason and may we raise our glasses for a stiff one. (Although do try not to get pickled, not yet anyway, lack of shelf space at the moment….) His recent loss will no doubt be hard-on his dear widow but I'm sure the memory of his manhood lingers in her hands. I mean thoughts. Indeed he was not just any Tom, Dick or Harry and I would urge they should erect a mighty column in his honour in the town square, providing a delightful sun dial into the bargain. Three cheers for the old fella!
@Madame – Quite superb. A fitting tribute indeed to a man who lost his head when all about him were keeping theirs.
"beat him by a head"?!
Trish, I'm shocked at you. Impressed, but shocked.
@Steve – I thought that was rather good too. I'm wondering how many penis puns I'll get in the comments: can't wait to see what lengths people will go to!
It ain't what you got it's what you DO with it though. Or so i shall continue to believe.Whilst being grateful for small mercies.
@Sally – As long as it doesn't resemble the specimens I saw belonging to the hamster and the mouse then I'm in complete agreement.
Gosh. I have sad visions of sweet little Elmo saying to Dorethy ' this is a penis Dorethy, this is plaster of paris' . Dang spell pecker semens to have dicked up the theme and it's nob joke trying to spurt it out.
@Kelloggsville – Fabulous! I LOVE your spell pecker!
I feel it's too early for my mind to come up with some filth, sorry double entendres, but will fnar fnar do?
Any comment I leave now will seem limp. An impressive post as always, keep it up and keep them coming!
@Very Bored – Fnar fnar will do perfectly well.
@Christine – Ah I see what you did there!
Speechless!
Bet you get loads of hits on this post Trish! I did a post once on "sweaty stairs" of LA and unbeknownst to me just the sweaty word drew loads of searches. (let us know, its probably spiking as I write!)
I reckon Pall will be a hard on(e) to follow. Sorry but it's bank holiday and my brain is on strike!
I trust your husband now gets nervous when you carry a scissors in one hand and a stamped address envelope in the other.
@Expat Mum – that'll make a change, missus 😉
@About last weekend – can't be any worse than my posts about The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas – a year later I'm still getting hits!
@Wylye Girl – That'll do fine: go and lie down, have a rest!
@Bass Pryce – I think the bottle of formalin in the garage might be worrying him too.
I need a stiff (!) gin after reading that one!!
PS Thought i'd left a comment last week but sometimes on the iphone they never arrive for some reason.